Upcoming Events

Maddy Smith is a castmember on MTV’s Wild N Out, a nationally touring comedian, and a social media icon. Originally from Buffalo, Maddy is known for her quick wit and cutting roasts, and her seemingly lack of fear of whatever comes out of her mouth. After 5 seasons on Wild N Out, most would agree that what Maddy says is often “out of pocket” but you’ll have to see for yourself in one of her multi-million viewed YouTube compilations.

Maddy opens for Bert Kreischer and Theo Von and has made appearances on BET, HBO, Barstool Sports, and more. She’s a regular at the Comedy Cellar in NYC.

In addition to the two-item minimum, there will be an 18% administrative fee in the showroom.

Management reserves the right to prevent customers from entering the facility who they deem disruptive or dangerous to other patrons.

Grab a free ticket at the box office, and enjoy over 20 comedians performing live!

Admission is FREE with a two-item minimum! Save your seat now!

In addition to the two-item minimum, there will be an 18% administrative fee in the showroom.

Management reserves the right to prevent customers from entering the facility who they deem disruptive or dangerous to other patrons.

William Flournoy Montgomery is an American comedian currently residing in Austin Texas. He is known as the longest running regular on the #1 live podcast in the world Kill Tony. William regularly features around the United States for Tony Hinchcliffe and Duncan Trussell. The Memphis Strangler can be seen on Showtime’s Comedy Store documentary and has made numerous appearances on comedy festivals around the country. The Big Red Machine has his own podcast the William Montgomery Show which is available everywhere podcasts can be seen and heard. Also The Vanilla Gorilla is currently headlining certain cities and those tour dates are available on his website.

In addition to the two-item minimum, there will be an 18% administrative fee in the showroom.

Management reserves the right to prevent customers from entering the facility who they deem disruptive or dangerous to other patrons.

The Don't Call Me White Girl show features rising comedian and viral social media sensation Don't Call Me White Girl. The Philadelphia native doesn't hold her tongue as she delivers her unique brand of insight, advice, and commentary in this highly entertaining weekly audio-visual podcast.

In addition to the two-item minimum, there will be an 18% administrative fee in the showroom.

Management reserves the right to prevent customers from entering the facility who they deem disruptive or dangerous to other patrons.

Shawn Gardini is an All-American stand up comedian from Philadelphia by way of New Jersey. He is 5'7 and 140lbs.

You may know him as the producer of Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast. From the sketch show Gilly and Keeves. Or his appearances on other podcasts. God Bless you all.

In addition to the two-item minimum, there will be an 18% administrative fee in the showroom.

Management reserves the right to prevent customers from entering the facility who they deem disruptive or dangerous to other patrons.

You know Tom Green from his innovative, anything-goes run as the most unpredictable personality on MTV's "The Tom Green Show", and his unforgettable, deliciously loony roles in the uproarious film comedies including "Road Trip," “Charlie Angels,” “Bob The Butler,” “Stealing Harvard” and "Freddy Got Fingered.”

The multi-talented Canadian comedian, actor, director, and broadcaster graced the cover of Rolling Stone, commandeered the coveted guest-host chair on "The Late Show with David Letterman," and conquered the World Wide Web with his free-wheeling, wildly popular internet talk show, which has been credited with kicking off the podcast revolution.

He tours worldwide, performing standup comedy at sold-out venues. He is also actively producing and directing content for the popular Van Life series on YouTube.com/tomgreen - as well as several soon-to-be-announced film and television projects.

In addition to the two-item minimum, there will be an 18% administrative fee in the showroom.

Management reserves the right to prevent customers from entering the facility who they deem disruptive or dangerous to other patrons.

Originally from St. Petersburg, Florida & currently based in Atlanta, Calimar is a hilarious standup comic, actor, influencer & business owner. Most known for his real-life videos that often go viral, he has taken the world by storm via his company OCDA where he confronts managers in the workplace with real complaints submitted by their fellow employees. His digital footprint continues to rapidly increase with over 890K followers on TikTok and over 270K on Instagram.

He has shared the stage with A-list comedians such as Mike Epps, 85 South (DC Young Fly, Karlous Miller & Chico Bean), DeRay Davis, Lavell Crawford, Michael Blackson & others, and is now headlining his own comedy shows across the country.

He has a hit viral song on Worldstar titled “Never Do S#!T” at Work” and most recently guest starred in T.I.’s sequel to Da Partments (Da Partments 2).

In addition to the two-item minimum, there will be an 18% administrative fee in the showroom.

Management reserves the right to prevent customers from entering the facility who they deem disruptive or dangerous to other patrons.

Test your comedic limits! Get ready for the raunchiest, naughtiest, dirtiest, on-no-he-didn’t comedy show! Bring your honey, lover, boo or best friend and find out just how far their comedic envelope can be pushed. Hosted by Don Johnson

In addition to the two-item minimum, there will be an 18% administrative fee in the showroom.

Management reserves the right to prevent customers from entering the facility who they deem disruptive or dangerous to other patrons.

Corey Bonalewicz, aka COREY B, is an American radio personality, comedian, and content creator based in New York. Corey B has been working in Radio for over ten years. He got his start in New Orleans and has hosted radio shows in Chicago and New York. Prior to the pandemic, Corey performed stand up in the New York comedy club circuit and was planning on touring. Corey shifted his focus to long form content during the pandemic which showcased his comedic style on top of food hacks. He has amassed over 9M followers on TikTok and almost 6M followers on Facebook. He is releasing his own BBQ sauce and has equity in a New York restaurant and cookie company. Corey co-hosts a podcast, Cane and Corey, which is currently behind a paywall. He had a family YouTube page with his fiancé, The B Family, with a decent following but stopped posting due to restrictions on videos with children in them. Corey would like to dive back into YouTube and build upon this audience with a Corey B Reacts and Corey B Reviews page.

In addition to the two-item minimum, there will be an 18% administrative fee in the showroom.

Management reserves the right to prevent customers from entering the facility who they deem disruptive or dangerous to other patrons.

What do questions like "What are my parents hiding from me?", "What has been making life difficult at the nudist colony?", and "What would grandma find disturbing, yet oddly charming?" have in common? They're all potential jokes that can be heard on our brand-new show, Comics Against Humanity! A show that brings the beloved and horribly amazing game "Cards Against Humanity" to life! Watch as the best local comedians improvise their sets on the spot using cards from the game as inspiration! Hosted by Rick Matthews.

In addition to the two-item minimum, there will be an 18% administrative fee in the showroom.

Management reserves the right to prevent customers from entering the facility who they deem disruptive or dangerous to other patrons.

Justin Silva was born and raised in New Haven, CT. He started doing comedy at the age of 21. Prior to comedy, he was an electrician full-time, and a server at Chili’s part-time. The workforce was not working out for him. After his first comedy show, he learned it was where he belonged. Justin fell in love with being on the stage and making people laugh. A year and a half later, he quit his jobs to pursue his dream. Justin got on stage as much as he could. Attending open mics. Performing for free at comedy shows and accepting hosting gigs for very little to no money. In efforts to share his comedy with the world, he began making content and posting on social media.

Buzz, traffic, and popularity all grew up and blew up. He decided, with his fiancé Ashley Cotto it was time to leave Connecticut and take the leap of faith to move to Florida. Justin continued to grind and work hard every day to become a bigger act. He wants to create people’s favorite space to laugh and is currently touring in a 2024 Worldwide Tour.

He believes what you put in this game is what you get out of it. Justin will continue to put in all that he can, with great faith that he gets everything he can out of it. Creating content, performing comedy year-round while providing for his family, and keeping the faith in making a living; his 5 children are his main inspiration and drive him every day to conquer his dreams.

In addition to the two-item minimum, there will be an 18% administrative fee in the showroom.

Management reserves the right to prevent customers from entering the facility who they deem disruptive or dangerous to other patrons.

Ring in the New Year with an evening filled with laughter courtesy of Lucas Zelnick! There's no better place to welcome 2025 than right here at Helium!

10:30 PM Show includes party favors and a champagne toast at midnight!

Lucas Zelnick is a stand-up comedian born, raised, and based in New York City, who challenges his cushy upbringing through punch-heavy material. Lucas’s stand-up clips have exploded online, where he has received over 100M views and 500K+ followers across Instagram and TikTok. In 2022, Lucas established a strong baseline for himself as a touring comedian, selling out 8 shows at Zanies Chicago. That same year, he appeared in SF Sketchfest and as a guest on Amazon Prime Video’s Sports Talk. 2023 was a breakout year for Lucas: he headlined the New York Comedy Festival, taped a secret set with Don't Tell Comedy, and taped his Comedy Central debut for Season 14 of Comedy Central Stand-Up Featuring. For no particular reason, he also holds an MBA from the Stanford Graduate School of Business.

In addition to the two-item minimum, there will be an 18% administrative fee in the showroom.

Management reserves the right to prevent customers from entering the facility who they deem disruptive or dangerous to other patrons.

Lil Duval became a regular featured performer on 3 seasons of BET's "ComicView" and a star player on MTV's "Guy Code." Powell released his second DVD, "Put Your Hands on Me," and appeared in Three 6 Mafia's independent film, "Choices II: The Setup."

In addition to the two-item minimum, there will be an 18% administrative fee in the showroom.

Management reserves the right to prevent customers from entering the facility who they deem disruptive or dangerous to other patrons.

This past summer, Craig Conant was the standout “Unrepped New Face” at the prestigious Just For Laughs Festival in Montreal. He was born in Los Angeles to a Mexican mother and an angry white father growing up with a lot of baseball and illegal fireworks. Conant is now sober, (despite the look on his face), and recently appeared on MTV’s “Greatest Party Story Ever Told” where he received accolades for his unique comedic voice. He has a hugely successful podcast entitled “Community Service” and was also recently fired from Trader Joe’s, come find out why!

In addition to the two-item minimum, there will be an 18% administrative fee in the showroom.

Management reserves the right to prevent customers from entering the facility who they deem disruptive or dangerous to other patrons.

Actor and comedian Jamie Lissow is currently a regular weekly guest on the #1 rated late night talk show, Gutfeld! on Fox. Jamie is best known for his starring role in two seasons of the Netflix Original Series “Real Rob”, alongside SNL alums Rob Schneider, Adam Sandler, Norm MacDonald and David Spade; a show Jamie co-wrote and co-produced. Jamie has appeared on The Tonight Show, The Late Late Show, Last Comic Standing, has his own half hour Comedy Central special and a Dry Bar Comedy Special with over 20 Million views. Jamie recently wrapped his first movie, Daddy Daughter Trip, where he appears alongside John Cleese, Rob Schneider, and Micheal Bublé - a movie he co-wrote and produced. Jamie is currently writing and will be starring in the feature film, The Animal 2, for Fox/Tubi and headlining stand-up comedy shows across the country.

In addition to the two-item minimum, there will be an 18% administrative fee in the showroom.

Management reserves the right to prevent customers from entering the facility who they deem disruptive or dangerous to other patrons.

Mississippi native Karlous Miller grew up in a large blended family including eight siblings, who all became a major influence on his edgy and boisterous comedy style. After working briefly as a firefighter in Oxford, he moved to Atlanta in 2005 to pursue a career as a stand-up comedian. He’s been making audiences laugh ever since.

As a comedian/actor, Karlous is most known for being a veteran cast member on MTV’s Wild ‘N Out with Nick Cannon. The NBC’s LAST COMIC STANDING alum, was also be seen on MTV’s JOKING OFF, MTV2’s UNCOMMON SENSE, BET’s COMIC VIEW, and Bill Bellamy’s WHO’S GOT JOKES. He was featured on HBO’s stand-up series ALL DEF COMEDY and performed his 30-minute special on Kevin Hart’s Laugh Out Loud Network. Karlous has also guest starred in the sitcom FAMILY TIME for Bounce TV and co-hosts MTV’s: What’s My Secret.

He’s a huge fan of hip hop and has worked with musicians like Jermaine Dupri, Case, Gucci Mane, Dem Franchize Boyz, Grandaddy Souf, Big Oomp and T.I.'s Grand Hustle Comedy.

Karlous has become the voice of this generation with a huge social media following. Every week, Karlous hosts the hit 85 SOUTH SHOW podcast with DC Young Fly and Chico Bean, which has gained a fan base across the globe. As co-host and creator of the 85 SOUTH SHOW, he has been nominated for the iHeart Radio Best Comedy Podcast.

As a member of the Atlanta-based comedy trio 85 South, Karlous is a two-time host of BET’s Hip Hop Awards and is currently a featured comedian on the In Real Life Tour. As a stand-up comedian, he frequently performs to sold-out audiences nationwide.

In addition to the two-item minimum, there will be an 18% administrative fee in the showroom.

Management reserves the right to prevent customers from entering the facility who they deem disruptive or dangerous to other patrons.

Native Metro Detroiter, Joe Dombrowski took the world by storm in 2017 with a viral April Fools’ Day spelling test prank that landed him multiple appearances on the Ellen DeGeneres show. Don't get it twisted though! It takes at least 20 years to be an overnight sensation! Joe has been doing stand up comedy since he was eight years old in his third grade talent show. He's never stopped! Since Joe rise to fame, he has been traveling the globe with his stand-up comedy which often highlights his outrageous family dynamics and of course his time as a former elementary school teacher. Joe has been featured as a headlining act at the Just For Laughs comedy festival in Montreal, The New York comedy festival and the Netflix Is a Joke Fest. Joe is also incredibly humbled to be hosting a monthly show at the world famous Comedy Story in Los Angeles. When he’s not getting creative on stages and screens, Joe spends his time in Seattle, Washington producing his podcast “Social Studies” with his good friend and high school history teacher, Gaspare Randazzo, where they recap outlandish stories from fans all over the country.

In addition to the two-item minimum, there will be an 18% administrative fee in the showroom.

Management reserves the right to prevent customers from entering the facility who they deem disruptive or dangerous to other patrons.

Dan Licata is a NYC-based comedian and high school senior. A fixture of the Brooklyn alternative comedy scene, Dan has written for shows such as Saturday Night Live, Teenage Euthanasia, and Joe Pera Talks With You, on which he also served as a producer and appeared as "Radio DJ." One of the episodes he wrote titled 'Joe Pera Reads You the Church Announcements' was included in several year-end lists. Dan was named a "Comedian You Should and Will Know" by Vulture, and was selected as one of the New Faces of Comedy at the Just For Laughs festival in Montreal, where his set was described as "a hyper storm of unbridled manic hilarity...". In 2024, he returned to his hometown of Buffalo, NY to record his first comedy special, FOR THE BOYS, in front of an audience entirely comprised of 15-year-old boys, where his set was described as "not appropriate for 15-year-old boys."

In addition to the two-item minimum, there will be an 18% administrative fee in the showroom.

Management reserves the right to prevent customers from entering the facility who they deem disruptive or dangerous to other patrons.

Hans Kim is a regular on Kill Tony and has opened up for Joe Rogan and Tony Hinchcliffe. Hans Kim is a big player on the social networking scene, where he has amassed over a hundred friends. Hans Kim is strong both physically and emotionally. He was voted the 3rd most improved indie one-liner comic in North Austin, June 2016.

In addition to the two-item minimum, there will be an 18% administrative fee in the showroom.

Management reserves the right to prevent customers from entering the facility who they deem disruptive or dangerous to other patrons.

Geoffrey Asmus began performing stand-up in 2013 immediately after wasting $143,548 on seven college degrees. He has performed at "Just For Laughs" in Montreal as a 'New Face' and was also featured on FOX’s "Laughs," "CollegeHumor," and Kevin Hart’s "LOL Network." Geoffrey has opened for Dave Attell, Mark Normand, Dan Soder, Fortune Feimster, Sam Morrill, Daniel Sloss, Joe List, and Aparna Nancherla, among others. He headlines comedy clubs nationwide.

In addition to the two-item minimum, there will be an 18% administrative fee in the showroom.

Management reserves the right to prevent customers from entering the facility who they deem disruptive or dangerous to other patrons.

Jordan Jensen is a stand-up comedian who hosts the podcast “RIP Jordan Jensen” and co-hosts the "Bein' Ian with Jordan" podcast. She can be seen on "The Late Late Show with James Corden" and at the world famous Comedy Cellar.

In addition to the two-item minimum, there will be an 18% administrative fee in the showroom.

Management reserves the right to prevent customers from entering the facility who they deem disruptive or dangerous to other patrons.

Learn the fundamentals of performing stand-up comedy at our one-day intensive workshop!

Seasoned instructors will cover everything from the basics of joke writing and proper joke structure to performing your conceptualized ideas on stage! Don’t miss this all-day workshop that will answer your burning questions about comedy, provide you with insights into making a career out of your passion, and a whole lot more!

February 11th workshop runs from 6 - 9 PM!

PLUS All attendees will receive $100 off our next Stand-up course!*

*Not valid with any other discounts

Musical Monday is the Internet’s favorite improv comedy band. With 1.7 million followers online, Musical Monday has generated nearly a billion views with their improv songs and unscripted shenanigans. Their live show is like if a band and a comedian had a baby inside of a comedy theater: half concert, half comedy show, all improvised.

In addition to the two-item minimum, there will be an 18% administrative fee in the showroom.

Management reserves the right to prevent customers from entering the facility who they deem disruptive or dangerous to other patrons.

Steph Tolev is a stand-up and sketch comedian from Toronto, Canada, currently living in Los Angeles. Her unique brand of absurd and personal comedy has made her an audience favorite across North America both on stage and on television. As a stand-up comic, Steph has done the prestigious Just For Laughs Comedy Festival in Montreal four times, three of which were taped for TV. Steph made her American TV debut on Comedy Central's part of Bill Burr’s show “The Ringers”. This past year she filmed her first half-hour stand-up special part of season two of “Unprotected Sets” airing on Epix. She was named one of Vulture's “Comics You Should and Will Know” and one of Comedy Central’s “Up Next” comics to watch. She also co-wrote and co-stars in the Comedy Central web series “Steph & Deb." Steph can also be seen in the Amazon show “Please Understand Me” produced by Sarah Silverman, and was featured in season two of “Corporate” on Comedy Central. Steph has won the Canadian Comedy Award for "Best Female Stand-Up" and her latest album, “I’m Not Well,” was nominated for a Juno Award for “Best Comedy Album of The Year”.

In addition to the two-item minimum, there will be an 18% administrative fee in the showroom.

Management reserves the right to prevent customers from entering the facility who they deem disruptive or dangerous to other patrons.

Jen Fulwiler is a standup comic, bestselling author, and mom of six. She was the host of the daily talk radio show The Jen Fulwiler Show on the national SiriusXM network, and when she launched her own podcast, This Is Jen, it debuted in the iTunes Comedy Top 10. She has been featured on the Today Show and CNN, and her viral social media sketches have racked up millions of views. Her standup comedy special, The Naughty Corner, is out now on Amazon.

In addition to the two-item minimum, there will be an 18% administrative fee in the showroom.

Management reserves the right to prevent customers from entering the facility who they deem disruptive or dangerous to other patrons.

Guinness World Record-holder Jacques ze Whipper brings his nationally renowned act to Helium Comedy Club. A mix of classic circus and stand-up comedy, it’s an act guaranteed to crack you up in more ways than one!

In addition to the two-item minimum, there will be an 18% administrative fee in the showroom.

Management reserves the right to prevent customers from entering the facility who they deem disruptive or dangerous to other patrons.

Rachel Scanlon is an LA based stand-up comedian, host, writer, and podcaster from Minnesota. She is the co-host of the podcast and nationally touring live show TWO DYKES AND A MIC. Most recently, you've seen Rachel on DON’T TELL COMEDY, STRAIGHT UP, STAND UP on Just For Laughs’ digital platform, and Comedy Central. She is currently on a sold out tour throughout the US performing her hour.

In addition to the two-item minimum, there will be an 18% administrative fee in the showroom.

Management reserves the right to prevent customers from entering the facility who they deem disruptive or dangerous to other patrons.

Dave Attell, the legendary stand-up comedian's, new Netflix Comedy Special HOT CROSS BUNS premiered in March to huge numbers and rave reviews. He is best known as the host of Comedy Central's INSOMNIAC WITH DAVE ATTELL, which gave him a cult following. He can next be seen in the Hulu series LIFE & BETH alongside Amy Schumer, Michael Rapaport, and Michael Cera. He can also be seen on BUMPING MICS with Jeff Ross, currently streaming on Netflix, and HBO’s CRASHING with Pete Holmes. His series DAVE’S OLD PORN ran for 2 seasons on Showtime, and his stand up series, DAVE ATTELL’S COMEDY UNDERGROUND, and his one hour special, ROAD WORK, were featured on Comedy Central. ROAD WORK is currently streaming on Paramount+.

His film credits include Chris Rock’s cult film, POOTIE TANG, FUNNY PEOPLE, SCARY MOVIE 4, and LOS ENCHILADAS and in the Amy Schumer films TRAINWRECK and I FEEL PRETTY. His television credits include, THE SIMPSONS, DIFFICULT PEOPLE, BOB’S BURGERS, ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT, THE JIM GAFFIGAN SHOW, THE JIM NORTON SHOW, INSIDE AMY SCHUMER, LOUIE, ED, EVERYBODY LOVES RAYMOND, and TOUGH CROWD WITH COLIN QUINN. He was named one of the “25 Funniest People in America” by Entertainment Weekly Magazine. When not on the road, Attell makes regular appearances at the Comedy Cellar in New York City.

In addition to the two-item minimum, there will be an 18% administrative fee in the showroom.

Management reserves the right to prevent customers from entering the facility who they deem disruptive or dangerous to other patrons.

Steven Ho is a retired ER tech who has found a new career path as a comedian. Originally from California, Ho spent over a decade working in emergency medicine, using his quick thinking and problem-solving skills to save lives and help those in need. However, Ho also had a passion for comedy and entertaining, and he began performing stand-up comedy in his free time.

Over time, Ho’s comedy career began to take off, and he found himself booking more and more shows. Eventually, he made the difficult decision to retire from his work in the medical field and focus on his comedy full-time. He has since performed at comedy clubs and festivals all over the country.

In addition to the two-item minimum, there will be an 18% administrative fee in the showroom.

Management reserves the right to prevent customers from entering the facility who they deem disruptive or dangerous to other patrons.

We're closed today today - but in the meantime click the Events tab above to check out all of our great upcoming shows!

Join Kristin Key -- nationally headlining, queer, musical comedian, and viral sensation -- for an unforgettable evening of hilarious comedy, music, inclusion, and connection. Between her popular Dry Bar comedy special, viral "Lesbian National Anthem" song, and stand-up clips from shows nationwide, Kristin's videos have over 25 million views with more than 300,000 followers. Host of the popular podcast "Kristin Knows Blank," Kristin has been featured on NBC's "Last Comic Standing" and "Bring the Funny," and has released multiple popular comedy albums.

Management reserves the right to prevent customers from entering the facility who they deem disruptive or dangerous to other patrons.

Author, columnist, and comedian Steve Hofstetter is often called the hardest working man in show-business. With all due respect to the late James Brown.

Hofstetter's national TV debut came on ESPN's Quite Frankly, where Stephen A. Smith yelled at him for three minutes. Hofstetter has also appeared on CBS' "Late Late Show With Craig Ferguson", Showtime's "White Boyz in the Hood", VH1's "Countdown", Sundance's "On the Road in America", and ABC's "Barbara Walter's Special", where he thankfully did not cry. He is the host and executive producer of "Laughs" on Fox networks, where he only cries occasionally.

One of the top booked acts on the college circuit, the original writer for collegehumor.com has also released six albums. Hofstetter has written humor columns for the New York Times, SportsIllustrated.com, and NHL.com, where he publicly admitted to being a Ranger fan.

After hosting Four Quotas on Sirius Satellite Radio for two seasons, Hofstetter moved to broadcast radio, and his Sports Minute (Or So) was syndicated on over 170 stations and in over 30 newspapers. Hofstetter's second live comedy album ("Cure For the Cable Guy") reached #20 on Billboard's comedy charts. His third album ("Dark Side of the Room") was the first ever pay-what-you-want" comedy album, since people were going to steal it anyway. His fourth album consisted of an hour of 100% ad-libbed material, which is, frankly, nuts. And his fifth album hit #1 on iTunes' comedy charts, which is also a bit nuts.

Hofstetter's brutal tour schedule consists of over 100 colleges and dozens of clubs every year, and is fueled by an immense online popularity, tons of press, and a Prius with great gas mileage. He reached 200,000 friends on Facebook (still the world record), 400,000 more on MySpace, and high shelves in grocery stores.

While Hofstetter's live shows are routinely sold out, he is best known for his writing, first published at age 15, mainly to impress girls. At 18, he co-founded "Sports Jerk of the Week", an irreverent website featured by press like USA Today's Baseball Weekly, Sports Illustrated and CNN. And at 20, Hofstetter took a year off of school to head up web content for the New York Yankees. The Yankees won the World Series that year, which would have been wonderful if they hadn't beaten Hofstetter's Mets. Yes, he's also a Mets fan. Poor kid.

While an undergraduate at Columbia University, Hofstetter was a well-read columnist for the Columbia Daily Spectator and a voice of the Lions. After a summer writing for Maxim, ESPN, and Sports Illustrated for Kids, Hofstetter syndicated his column in several newspapers.

Without his glasses, Hofstetter also looks a great deal like Michael Rappaport.

In addition to the two-item minimum, there will be an 18% administrative fee in the showroom.

Management reserves the right to prevent customers from entering the facility who they deem disruptive or dangerous to other patrons.